There are some lovely poems here—I especially like “Things to Do If You Are a Mole.” But the “things to do” theme struck me as a bit loose. I felt I had to make big leaps moving from King Kong to nature to a pencil, and found a little puzzled by the whole.
Yes, the “things to do” poems ARE about various and sundry things: a bus, a snail, an acorn, the grass, a mountain, the rain, the ocean, a castle, a grandfather clock, scissors—and King Kong. After I received the rejection letter, I tried to think of ways to keep all the poems that I’d already written and still make Things to Do seem like a more cohesive collection. That’s when I wondered if I should organize the poems into different categories—and include three or four poems in each category.
Since I had two poems about objects in space—Things to Do If You Are the Sun and Things to Do If You Are a Star—I thought it might be a good idea to include a poem about the moon…so I wrote Things to Do If You Are the Moon. But I didn’t like it! It was too prosaic. No matter how much I fiddled with it—I didn’t hear any music. So I put the poem aside…for a long time.
Then, on Wednesday, while I was taking a shower—the beginning of a “things to do” moon poem popped into my head. I worked on the poem on Wednesday and Thursday. It still needs some work—but I think it’s much better than my first moon poem. Here is my second attempt:
THINGS TO DO IF YOU ARE THE MOON
Live in the sky.
Wax and wane
in your starry terrain.
Be a circle of light,
just a sliver of white,
or hide in the shadows
and vanish from sight.
Look like a pearl
when you’re brim-full
Hang in the darkness
and dazzle the night.
Jules has the Poetry Friday Roundup at Seven Impossible Things.