Friday, July 13, 2018

Two Bee Poems: Revising for Publication




I had to revise a number of the poems in the THINGS TO DO manuscript that was submitted to Chronicle Books. A few had minor revisions; others required major changes. One that underwent a major change was the honeybee poem, which had originally been a "worker bee" poem.

Things to do if you are a WORKER BEE as it appeared in my manuscript:

Be yellow and fuzzy.
Stay busy. Be buzzy.
Tidy and clean.
Tend to your queen.
Be a working machine—
A syrup collector.
Go forage for nectar.
Reap pollen from flowers.
Don’t spend idle hours.
Don’t sit and relax.
Make honey and wax.
You must toil without end—
Yours is a lifetime of labor,
My friend.

My editor Melissa Manlove thought the poem was too long. She suggested I keep just the first two lines...and leave the poem at that. I decided to add two new lines to the beginning.

The final draft of Things to do if you are a HONEYBEE as it appears in my book:

Flit among flowers.
Sip nectar for hours.
Be yellow and fuzzy.
Stay busy.
Be buzzy.
***************
 

Sylvia Vardell has the Poetry Friday Roundup at Poetry for Children.
 

Friday, July 6, 2018

Two Original Beetle Poems

Today, I have two beetle poems for you. The first is a haiku; the second is a mask poem.


Beetle on a rose

in shining armor…ready

to battle sharp thorns

 


 

My love is this beautiful red, red rose.

Of all the blossoms, it’s the one I chose.

It has silky petals, leaves of emerald green.

It’s the yummiest flower that I’ve ever seen.

 ********************

 

Tricia has the Poetry Friday Roundup at The Miss Rumphius Effect.