It seems I'm always a week behind in posting my attempts at trying out the "poetry stretches" that Tricia has been giving us on Mondays this month at The Miss Rumphius Effect. Last week she challenged blog readers to try writing a lune. You can read more about the lune in Tricia's Monday Poetry Stretch-Lune post and at The Lune: The English Language Haiku.
I think the lunes I've posted here need a bit more tweaking. I usually write dozens of drafts of a poem before I feel satisfied that it's as good as I can make it. I used to share different drafts of some of my poems with my students to show them that a writer rarely gets a poem perfect the first time around. I know the fact that I wrote poetry helped to make me a much better writing teacher.
Not Yet Ready for Prime Time Lunes by Elaine Magliaro
PARTLY CLOUDY
Rays of sun poking
Long golden
Fingers through the clouds
SUMMER NIGHT SOUNDS
Mosquito’s whining
Through the night
Drowns out cricket’s song.
Rays of sun poking
Long golden
Fingers through the clouds
SUMMER NIGHT SOUNDS
Mosquito’s whining
Through the night
Drowns out cricket’s song.
END OF SUMMER
August has grown old
September
Waits at the threshold
SEPTEMBER QUARTET
Summer still sizzles
Soon it will
Fizzle into fall
Summer's sharp edges
Smoothed to silk
By autumn’s cool hand
Where will butterflies
Go now that
Summer has left town?
September sings as
School bells ring
Vacation’s over
ELEMENTARY ART CLASS
Bright yellow crescent
Pasted to
A royal blue night
3 comments:
Elaine,
These are lovely. Since I've not been sleeping lately and find myself listening night noises, I particularly like Summer Night Sounds.
I'll link this page soon!
Regards,
Tricia
Elaine, these are great! My favorites are Partly Cloudy and the first two of September Quartet. Very vivid!
I haven't had time to do these poetry challenges. Summer is chaos for me. Love the idea of them, though.
Laura
Tricia and Laura,
Thanks for your kind words.
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